Learning to Love Again

Jaala checking to see if the last WOD killed Clint
Crossfit Camp Eggers crew
Push up during the Crossfit Games Open Sectionals

It happened quite suddenly, though I sensed it coming. The feelings that permeated my body caused sensations of warmth and euphoria. Those feelings were followed by a strong urge to vomit. I couldn't stand still. I jumped from one foot to the other and stared at the sky. Music blaring through my headphones, I tried to drown out the other worldly noises around and suppress the overwhelming feelings boiling up inside of me. I stood on my toes and grabbed for that which would set me free. Finally the moment arrived and everything became clear...today, I did a muscle up and realized that I have fallen back in love with Crossfit.

It has been a long journey to get here, but amidst jumping, screaming, hugging, and high fiving, I remembered what is so cool about crossfit. I remembered that crossfit provides a space for me to be free and challenged in my life. Within the confines of the gym, and under the open air of the sky, I can do anything. Today when I swung under the rings and dove through the top above them, today as I pressed myself into the air and screamed, I looked over at all of my friends and knew that I have come back to myself and this homecoming is thanks to crossfit.

As this unique type of love filled my heart I thought, "It is just in time! Thank goodness!"

In two weeks, I will be finished with Crossfit Asia Regionals and hopefully will be qualified to compete in the 2011 Crossfit Games. This is my dream.

Through almost ten months of training in Kabul, Afghanistan, through sickness, an unstable environment, lack of freedom, and sometimes unavoidable carbohydrate binges, I have somehow come back to being a crossfitter and it feels good!

As I train this last week here in Kabul with my fellow crossfitters at Camp Eggers, I anticipate that the weekend competing in Japan will be a proper culmination to a couple of years training; no matter what happens, I will be victorious because I will be doing something that I love, crossfit.

Wish me well, here I go!

The Ice Cream Man

He leans back on one elbow, tanned face turned up towards the warming Kabul sun. A scarf flails in the wind behind him like a lonely flag on an empty horizon. His eyes are closed, but under his lids, those eyes dart back and forth scanning the street for potential customers. Jacket and pants full of holes hang on his gaunt frame, looking for a way to shirk the dirt they have collected from years of dust. The red box beneath him belts out "My Heart Will Go On." Celine helps lure sweets lovers into his lair. He hums happily along with the tune though he has heard it 1000 times before; he says it reminds him of happier times. Children sprint towards him, glee flowing from mouths, blue UNICEF book bags falling to the uneven ground, change jumping out of their hands, anticipation pouring from their eyes. Self-importantly, he rises from his elbow and grins at the children. He begins to sing over and over again, "ICE CREAM, ICE CREAM, Who wants ICE CREAM." Everyone does.

Did you know there are ice cream men in Kabul?